Advice for Women

If you want someone who will bring you the paper without first tearing it
apart to remove the sports section
-buy a German Shepherd.

If you want someone willing to make a fool of himself simply over the joy of
seeing you
-buy a German Shepherd.

If you want someone who will eat whatever you put in front of him and never
says its not quite as good as his mother made it
-buy a German Shepherd.

If you want someone always willing to go out, at any hour, for as long and
wherever you want
-buy a German Shepherd.

If you want someone to scare away burglars, without a lethal weapon that
terrifies you and endangers the lives of your family and all the neighbors
-buy a German Shepherd.

If you want someone who will never touch the remote, doesn't give a damn
about football, and can sit next to you as you watch romantic movies
-buy a German Shepherd.

If you want someone who is content to get up on your bed just to warm your
feet and whom you can push off if he snores
-buy a German Shepherd.

If you want someone who never criticizes what you do, doesn't care if you
are pretty or ugly, fat or thin, young or old, who acts as if every word you
say is especially worthy of listening to, and who will love you
unconditionally forever
-buy a German Shepherd.

But on the other hand If you want someone who will never come when you call,
ignores you totally when you come home, leaves hair all over the place,
walks all over you, runs around all night, only comes home to eat and
sleep, and acts as if your entire existence is solely to ensure his
happiness,

Then my friend.............

Get a cat.

(Any resemblance to a man is purely coincidental)

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